The truth about me is that I like helping other people which may be a slight understatement of the fact because in all honesty, I really love it! I remember my grandmother telling me stories about my great-grandma Polly; about how generous she was. She would give the shirt off of her back to someone who needed her help. I feel like that’s part of my genetic gift. I love making a difference with people and inspiring them. Nothing brings me more joy than to bring a smile to someone else's face, but there’s a flip side.
The other truth is that I really dislike asking people for things, asking for help. Just like the intense emotion of delight I derive from assisting others, the polar opposite is how I feel when it comes to reaching out to others for support. I have a huge internal conversation around doing so. Everything from you’re a failure; you need to be more self-sufficient and independent; you should be more successful by now to you can’t trust people; you don’t have anyone you can really depend on; no one cares what’s going on with you, they have their own problems; you’re all alone, just deal with it.
Funny thing is, when approached by family or friends for my assistance that has never been my first reaction. I’ve welcomed friends into my home when they needed a safe harbor and have freely given money to those who asked for it without question. I’m delighted to assist the ones I love and care for so why do I worry my requests will be met with disregard or contempt? Perhaps it stems from my experience of having my generosity mistaken for foolery. Though most people treated my kindness with reverence there were those who completely disrespected me and took total advantage of my giving nature. This created in me a tendency to doubt and mistrust others. Though, as I learn, grow and evolve, I’ve come to recognize that a mistrust of others is merely a lack of trust in myself.
Tuning into my inner guidance is a key component to knowing when I am dealing with someone of a like-minded, generous and loving spirit. The more you know, understand, accept and respect yourself the more you will experience the same mirrored back to you. These lessons wrapped in sandpaper may be uncomfortable but if we choose to work through them instead of allowing them to suspend our forward motion we will come through the other side wiser, stronger and happier. Never allow the negative thoughts or actions of another person alter the beautiful, loving spirit you were born being.
The other truth is that I really dislike asking people for things, asking for help. Just like the intense emotion of delight I derive from assisting others, the polar opposite is how I feel when it comes to reaching out to others for support. I have a huge internal conversation around doing so. Everything from you’re a failure; you need to be more self-sufficient and independent; you should be more successful by now to you can’t trust people; you don’t have anyone you can really depend on; no one cares what’s going on with you, they have their own problems; you’re all alone, just deal with it.
Funny thing is, when approached by family or friends for my assistance that has never been my first reaction. I’ve welcomed friends into my home when they needed a safe harbor and have freely given money to those who asked for it without question. I’m delighted to assist the ones I love and care for so why do I worry my requests will be met with disregard or contempt? Perhaps it stems from my experience of having my generosity mistaken for foolery. Though most people treated my kindness with reverence there were those who completely disrespected me and took total advantage of my giving nature. This created in me a tendency to doubt and mistrust others. Though, as I learn, grow and evolve, I’ve come to recognize that a mistrust of others is merely a lack of trust in myself.
Tuning into my inner guidance is a key component to knowing when I am dealing with someone of a like-minded, generous and loving spirit. The more you know, understand, accept and respect yourself the more you will experience the same mirrored back to you. These lessons wrapped in sandpaper may be uncomfortable but if we choose to work through them instead of allowing them to suspend our forward motion we will come through the other side wiser, stronger and happier. Never allow the negative thoughts or actions of another person alter the beautiful, loving spirit you were born being.